Grief is one of life’s most difficult experiences, and when someone we care about loses a loved one, finding the right way to show support can feel overwhelming. Sympathy flowers have long been a thoughtful and compassionate gesture—a way to say, “I’m thinking of you,” when words seem inadequate. But knowing when to send them and what to say in the accompanying card can be just as important as the flowers themselves.

In this guide, we’ll explore the appropriate times to send sympathy flowers, the types of arrangements you can choose, and how to craft a meaningful message that provides comfort, respect, and support.

Why Sympathy Flowers Matter

Flowers have a universal language. They offer beauty, peace, and a sense of care—qualities that are especially needed during times of mourning. A carefully selected bouquet or arrangement can:

• Acknowledge the loss
• Show you’re thinking of the person and their family
• Offer comfort during a difficult time
• Add warmth and presence when you can’t be there in person

Sympathy flowers are not about making a grand gesture; they are about quietly showing that you care.

When to Send Sympathy Flowers

1. As Soon as You Hear the News

One of the most common times to send sympathy flowers is shortly after hearing about the passing. Flowers delivered to the family’s home let them know they’re not alone in their grief. These are not funeral arrangements, but rather more subtle, comforting displays such as vase bouquets, soft-hued posies, or even potted plants.

Best arrangements:

• Soft-coloured mixed bouquets
• White lilies, roses, or orchids
• Peace lilies or flowering indoor plants

2. Before or On the Day of the Funeral

If you are sending funeral flowers to the service itself—whether at a church, chapel, or cemetery like Fremantle Cemetery—timing is crucial. The florist or funeral director will often coordinate the delivery to ensure flowers arrive ahead of the service.

You might also choose to attend the funeral and bring flowers with you or lay them at the graveside. Just ensure the family has not requested “no flowers” or donations in lieu.

Best arrangements:

• Wreaths
• Standing sprays or floral crosses
• Casket sprays (from immediate family only)
• Native floral tributes (for outdoor or eco-conscious services)

💡 Read more: Guide about sympathy and funeral flowers

3. In the Days or Weeks After the Funeral

Grief doesn’t end with the service. In fact, the weeks following the funeral are often the hardest, when the visitors have left, the planning is over, and the reality of the loss sets in. Sending sympathy flowers, a week or two later can be incredibly meaningful—a reminder that the person hasn’t been forgotten.

This is also a good time to send flowers if you were unable to attend the funeral, or if you’ve only just heard about the passing.

Best arrangements:

• Calming vase arrangements
• Fragrant, seasonal flowers
• Dried bouquets or preserved flowers
• Potted flowering plants

4. On the Anniversary of the Loss

For close friends and family members, the anniversary of a death can brings a renewed wave of sorrow. Sending flowers on that date—either to the family or placed at the gravesite—is a touching way to say, “I remember.”

Adding a heartfelt note or memory in the card makes this gesture even more meaningful.

Where to Send Sympathy Flowers

• To the home: Most common and appropriate for sympathy flowers
• To the funeral service: Coordinate with the funeral home or florist
• To the workplace: If you know the bereaved well and want to offer support in a professional setting
• To the cemetery or memorial site: Especially appropriate on anniversaries or visits

Florists like Spearwood Florist in Perth offer reliable delivery to homes, chapels, and cemeteries, with options ranging from simple bouquets to formal funeral tributes.

“We often help customers choose flowers that reflect the personality of the person who passed or the comfort they want to extend to the grieving family,” says Nathalie from Spearwood Florist.

What to Write in a Sympathy Card

One of the most challenging parts of sending sympathy flowers is deciding what to say on the card. You want to be sincere, respectful, and comforting—but not overly wordy or sentimental.

Here are a few tips:

Keep It Simple

A short, heartfelt message is often best. Avoid clichés or trying to make sense of the loss. Just be present.

Examples:

• “Thinking of you during this difficult time.”
• “With deepest sympathy and all our love.”
• “Our hearts are with you and your family.”

Mention the Person by Name

Adding the name of the deceased makes your message more personal.

Examples:

• “In loving memory of David—he will always be remembered.”
• “We’re so sorry for your loss. Sarah was a beautiful soul.”

Offer Support

Let them know you’re there for them—whether now or later.

Examples:

• “Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need anything.”
• “Sending love and strength. We’re here for you.”

Sympathy Card Message Ideas by Relationship

For a Friend

• “I know how close you were. I’m so sorry for your loss.”
• “You’re in my thoughts every day. Please take all the time you need.”

For a Colleague

• “Thinking of you and your family during this difficult time.”
• “Wishing you comfort and peace in the days ahead.”

For a Partner or Spouse’s Loss

• “My heart breaks for you. I’m here with love and support.”
• “I know how much [name] meant to you. You’re not alone.”

For a Child or Parent’s Loss

• “There are no words for such a loss. Holding you close in my heart.”
• “May your memories bring some comfort in the days ahead.”

What Not to Say

Even with the best intentions, some messages can come across as insensitive. Try to avoid:

• “I know how you feel.” (Everyone grieves differently)
• “Everything happens for a reason.”
• “They’re in a better place now.”
• Jokes or humour (unless you’re very close and know it would be appreciated)

Instead, offer your presence, sympathy, and a reminder that you care.

Thoughtful Touches to Add

• Printed ribbons: Include phrases like “In Loving Memory” or the name of the deceased
• Favourite flowers or colours: Adds a personal element
• Inclusion of a memory: Mention a shared story or moment
• Include a photo: If hand-delivering or sending with a longer message

Final Thoughts

Sending sympathy flowers is a timeless, gentle way to express support during one of life’s most difficult times. Whether you send them immediately, after the funeral, or on an anniversary, the gesture tells the grieving family: You are not alone. Your loved one mattered.

And while it can be hard to find the perfect words, a short, heartfelt message in the card can offer comfort that lingers long after the flowers fade.

If you’re unsure about what to send or how to phrase your message, working with an experienced florist like Spearwood Florist can help. With compassionate service and delivery across Perth, they can guide you in choosing flowers that honour a life and support the people left behind.